It’s probably too late. We’re all gonna die as the latest demon spawn of climate change sweeps the area. But if you’re feeling optimistic, and a little adventurous at this point, you can stash your car in a safe space.
Pilot Report: Where to park your car during Hurricane Dorian
Published
Tidewater News and Opinion Forum 
I was going to park my car in Alabama until the “Not-Sharpie in Chief” alerted me to the dangers…
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I guess you needed to use a Lime scooter to get home after you parked it, and need a canoe to get back to it after the entire city is totally submerged by this end-of-the world, human-caused catastrophe, and the devil’s subsistence.
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If it gets that bad, I’m thinking of shimmying up to the top of the Johnny Reb monument to wait things out.
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When you get up there, check to see if I locked my car.
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